SCREAM
To smithereens of the purple sky right above my dumb existence,
I screamed all the letters which I had gathered-
Over suture pixels of endless summer noons
When I sat beside you
When I used to count birds and the number of times you blinked throughout the stupid, bizarre tales of mine
Do you remember the first letter I wrote for you?
I have saved every bit of it under my skin
I had read that to you, only you
And just when you told me to stop
I grasped your right hand and quilled the last word from it, the final breath of it swilled
Right at the mole over the mount of Venus
And you said "Ah! Buy me colours for I want to change the colours of the city"
To which I said "And how so?"
You sprang up and brought the terracotta vase which I had given you and showed the insides of it,
The ravishing contours had climbers with diamond studded leaves, the thick mist and scent had a bloom,
"I would like to change the insides of the revolutionary storm, the scarlet bricks, the earthly kerfuffle on the outlines of the throat of this city"
I screamed all the letters which I had gathered-
From the dossals of knitted polaroids,
Which are as real as me
And as real as you
Even today
When I am not even thinking of how it was back then
When I am not even explaining how it all happened
When I am not even listening to what I am writing
When I am not even seeing the things I am talking about
Even today
When I am as much full of flaws
As I was back then;
It made me happy when I sat beside you
And saw you smile
Like the gamin who collects feathers and colours
Down the street
Defying the agreements he has with his wicked father
Of bringing back money at the day's end
I screamed all the letters which I had gathered,
While I was feeding the pigeons
Like you used to do;
Running back to my room, I took off the pillow cover
Still wet in some memories
And some possibilities
I couldn't choose like men do
Neither could I make you my own,
For the birds I fed, ate grains, not which I offered
But which I shared
I sat down, at the porch which welcomes sunshine
Like guests at the embassy
And drew the hieroglyphics, which say
"Never mine"
This time I screamed the very pauses
That hide words, flowers and the entire universe,
I wish for you not like the men do
Who spend not hours but years with you,
Dropt at my feet are the very feathers
The pigeons left by
For this is their world and not mine
For this is your world and not mine
For the scorn and pride and the infinite vagaries of the very entity
I had painted you in
Like the waterfalls my mind beholds
Which takes within it the change it desires
And makes the rocks a bit bold limned not as quiescent
But as free as gravity pulls along with the falls,
In slumbers and heralds of springs,
You have changed the skin of the city too
But I followed the innocent you
Not like the men
Who spend not hours but years with you!
LOVE
O you ! In you , you and only you
Where lives this dead man so true ,
In your breaths my wars reside
I lash the air with you beside
Sunk in soil , my feet bare
Tempests flow in raging care !
As the thorns rip the layers -
My love , I drench in tears
The skin of this rose drips
To paint life on your lips
Bending o'er you do I kiss ,
You , an art and you , a bliss
Fleeting time and hurricane waves
Over the lost pile of mortal graves
Take my flesh and bones there
And wrap me in a cold fire !
I shall wait till the smokes rise
In the bivouac of cruel lies ,
I shall wait till the sands burn
Tell me not now it's my turn
In your silence my waking soul
Plants verses in earthly scroll ,
Like a merry bloom in spring
To the living will they sing
BETWEEN HEAVEN AND YOU
I love you eternal
For then and now
I am the home that you shall visit
Through every road you take
As they will lead you through bridges
That I built with all my heart
With all I have , with all I could gather
Around the smell of clay and rain
With twigs , ochre and brown
Those fabrics that still are strong
Enough
To hold our bones together
Swinging in spaces , in those places
In fields that treasure golden sands
In mirages of dunes through which we walked
Over those fires wild in west , precious metals
With pictures of us hanging ,
Stealing glimpses amidst busy crowds
Drinking oaths of carrying along
Perhaps your lips are fond of mine
Your crazy skin
And joys virgin
That your face
Spotless
Set these limbs of mine , numb
In the stars so white , I shall hold flowers
For only you , when all will leave ;
Together falling from the carpets
Of a sky , spilling verses from up high
The endless seas , salty sweat
Dwelling in memories , not imaginary
In lightning between our thighs
Running across our spine
Feathers of immortal wine
For miles , away in permanence
Breaths that circle in my ears
For not a moment , for years
In cups of melting hollow depths
Of snow , shadowless overcast
The fractured crystals of quartz
Over your fingers , shining wet silk
Over your arms , the flap of wings
Stretching past screams of islands
Like falls of gushing water ,
Raging winds across Pacific
Only you shall flood
When these doors I open
Half sunk , bare passions
Ours , in midst of desolate thoughts
Sleep in me
For an eternity
Where you are
That very far
Shall be near
Soon, my dear
The cusps hedge all my pain
In the fireplace
That knows no warmth
Since the day you left.
I shiver not in cold
Cause the love that turned to ashes
Has embellished this pale skin
With words that still shimmer.
Tonight, the sky echoes scenes
Which convulse with the shadows
Of the flicker,
Yet I yearn for more
Alms from this living stone
That bears your name.